Question
I’ve just received an invitation to a wedding but the reply card is blank except for the words “Please respond.” I’ve never seen this style of response card before. What am I supposed to write in the space?

Answer
Write your name and the names of any others from your household who will be attending. Simple as that!

Question
I am planning a formal noon wedding. The reception will start a 1 PM with a cocktail hour and then a 3 course meal to follow at 2 PM. Can my bridesmaids wear black, or is that in bad taste?

Answer
If you ask someone who is “Old School” they might agree that black is inappropriate for an afternoon wedding. However, black is now considered appropriate any time of the day. It’s sleek, it’s modern, it matches everything and it’ll make your bridesmaids feel slim and beautiful. Plus, your girls are more likely to be able to wear black again than any other color.

Question
One of the bridesmaid is telling the bride that she can't have a Matron of Honor and a Maid of Honor. Her Matron of Honor is her sister-in-law and her Maid of Honor is one of her best friends. The Bridesmaid is telling her that it's not proper or that no one does that because she has never heard of it. I was told there was nothing saying she couldn't according to Etiquette. Who is right?

Answer
You are right on this. Having both a maid of honor and a matron of honor or two maids of honor (or two matrons) is the “in” thing the last few years. The bride is free to decide what she wants to do at her wedding as long as she keeps it tasteful. The groom does not have to have two best men to match. I suggest to my brides that when they have two honor attendants, they choose one to sign the marriage license and the other to give a toast, to split some of the expected duties.

Question:
How much Gratuity should I give each vendor?

Answer:
Many of the vendors set a fee that is fair without the need to tip, such as musicians, bridal consultants, officiants, etc. The only categories that require gratuity are in the serving capacity at your reception, such as waiters, banquet captains, bartenders, and coat check staff. The typical tip for those in the food & beverage serving capacity is 15-20% of the total charge for their category. Some facilities automatically build the charge for that into their contract, so ask your catering director for clarification, to avoid double tipping. For coat checks and valets for guests’ cars, the customary tip is $1 per guest served. You are always welcome to tip addtional amounts, or for additional services, if you feel the service was extraordinary, or above and beyond the call of duty.